Progress = Clarity and Confidence (part 1)
The calmer the pond, the clearer the reflection." — Unknown
Busyness has probably been your friend since childhood. It might be time for that friendship to end.
Busyness is the antithesis of progress.
Busyness comes from a lack of two things: clarity and confidence.
Let’s face it - you probably lived a lot of your formative years without clarity. That makes sense. Especially if the little version of you didn’t have a gentle presence that was patient in your not-understanding.
And if you aren’t clear on things, it might have been hard for the little version of you to venture out and try things. Without trying, its hard to build confidence. Of course you lacked confidence. That makes sense too.
Progress occurs as you increase clarity and confidence. — Stuart Kibbe
I remember a bumpy season when I launched a company in a new industry.
Every day I would "work" for 10-12 hours, with the goal of building a successful company.
Although I was excited by my new venture, there was so much I didn’t know. I lacked clarity. The result was that I lived disassociated. Always pushing the pace, as if the more I “went hard”, the busier I was, the more likely I would hit the target.
I could have slowed down inside. (emotional clarity)
I could have identified my knowledge and skill gaps. (clarity of thought)
I could have upskilled. I could have paced myself, rather than sprinting and stopping. (clarity of action)
The result: I spent an entire year without signing a single client.
The issue wasn’t a lack of effort, unclear purpose or poor timing. It was clarity.
Progress doesn't have to be slower than necessary. — Stuart Kibbe
We will explore clarity of thought and clarity of action anther time.
How To Increase Emotional Clarity
A lack of emotional clarity is certainly a bi-product of a dis-regulated nervous system. We experience emotional clarity when we are aware of and pay attention to our emotions and are able to make sense of them.
Try this: (this might sound funny if this topic is new to you)
Ask you heart if it wants to tell you anything, then listen. Do you notice anything?
Intentionally focus on your different body parts. Look for sensations. Do you notice anything?
Narrate the feelings. The emotions and the sensations.
“I feel a tingly feeling in my stomach. My neck feels tight. My breathing is shallow.”
Then sit with those feelings. Just sit with them, like you would a close friend. No need to give advice or try and fix anything. Just sit with them.
Sitting with and narrating our emotions is the key to understanding them and integrating them with our mind and body.
When we can name it, we can tame it. By acknowledging and exploring our emotions mindfully, we create the space to integrate and understand them, rather than being overwhelmed.” (Daniel Siegel, The Mindful Brain, 2007)
How to increase confidence
(I posted too early… check back soon!)
Thank You For Reading.